HOW TO SET GOALS: IN A WAY THAT ACTUALLY HELPS

Hello May 🌸

I love May. I love the promise of spring/summer; of longer nights, and warmer days, and more time spent outdoors. I know some people say they love the very tangible change of seasons here in the UK, and I do. But mainly I love summer.

With the new month comes whispers of goal setting, what will you choose? I was once into them a big way. But in more recent years I gave up, because why bother when I literally never achieved what I set out to? It hurt more than setting non at all.

So maybe it’s odd then that I have written a post in favour of setting goals. But hear me out, okay? Because I think it is important.

CAN GOALS BE HELPFUL?

+ Yes: they can act like a set of directions, as something to work towards. But also that being said, it is also okay to get half way there and realise you’re not totally into where it’s going. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO CHANGE YOUR MIND. This is not giving up. It’s decision making.

+ Expectation tends to lead to reality because of the actions taken in light of that. You need to believe that you can achieve what you hope to. You are worth setting them. You are worth caring about things.

HOW CAN WE MAKE BETTER GOALS?

+ Seek intrinsic motivation vs extrinsic motivation (e.g. the thoughts of others). Are your goals in line with your values? How do they make you feel? Confident? Capable? Empowered? etc

+ Set smaller goals along the way:

Break the bigger goal into multiple goals (this is referred to as ‘sub goals’), aka the daily, weekly, monthly PRACTICES required to get there.

HOW CAN WE BETTER AT REACHING THEM?

+ Create if-then plans:

What might the challenges be? How could you navigate them if they arise?

+ Decrease the friction to do the steps and actions needed to achieve your goals, and make it more difficult to do the things that get in the way.

+ Ask for support from your loved ones 💖

If you have made it this far, woop! I hope you find this helpful. P.s believe in yourself p.p.S if you feel like you don’t have a big goal, that is okay. This isn’t about big things. It’s about the small things that we allow to add meaning to our lives.